Communicator (communicator) wrote,
Communicator
communicator

No, doctor, I said I was feeling Manky

From Matthew Turner. A guide to Northern English vernacular for NHS doctors.

'All the words and phrases used in this guide have been used by patients during consultation'

I think this is real, because the URL seems to be a real NHS site, but it is frickin' hilarious.


What kind of innocent wee lamb needs these terms explaining to him?

(real entries in this guide)

'Tummy Ache' = 'abdominal pain'
'Todger' = 'Penis'
'Tits' = 'breasts'
'Rotherham are at home' = 'I am menstruating'
'Dump' = 'faeces'
'Popped his clogs' = 'He died'
'It's me snatch' = 'I have a problem with my vagina'

Rotherham are at home? That's a new one.
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  • 29 comments

  • Phew what a scorcher

    I see Gove has backed down on climate change and it's back in the curriculum again.

  • GCSE Computer Science

    My book is now for sale

  • LJ Settings

    At the moment I have set up this journal so that only friends can comment. I hate doing this, but I was just getting too much Russian spam.