October 31st, 2010

breaking bad

Fry on women

There's been a bit of a fuss because Stephen Fry said:
If women liked sex as much as men, there would be straight cruising areas in the way there are gay cruising areas. Women would go and hang around in churchyards thinking: 'God, I've got to get my fucking rocks off', or they'd go to Hampstead Heath and meet strangers to shag behind a bush. It doesn't happen.

There have been a whole load of discussions about this today, but am I mistaken - there are straight outdoor cruising areas aren't there? They seem more common than gay cruising areas, or that is my impression. I'm friends with a guy who is in charge of recreational space for (a town near here) and they have had to take down the signs pointing to the country park for just this reason. It's close to the M6 junction, so it was a convenient outdoor meetup place. There's a small wood near my house that I used to go walking in, and that's now a dogging point.

And men and women have sex outdoors round the back of pubs? Or am I very old fashioned, perhaps this has all changed now?

Anyway, I think young women would be even more open to sex if the general hetero male culture were less hostile to them (less fear, less shame). For example that recent article in Gawker where a man publicly attacked Christine O'Donnel for spending the night with him. I don't like O'Donnel but I thought it was a horrible thing to write. Or all the countless articles in the papers shaming women for heterosexual activity or desire, and all the magazines telling women they aren't attractive enough to be desirable. That latter is such a big issue for women, I don't think men have any idea.

Anyway, of course many (most?) people both gay and straight prefer to express sexuality in a committed relationship, but that's another issue. I'm just saying, despite the dangers and the hostility, women do enter fairly enthusiastically into sexual relationships with men, is my impression of life.